peek

just taking a peek at my blog

2009-10-04T14:06:00.002+08:00

It looks pretty dead haha.

like huh o.o

2009-02-01T15:43:00.001+08:00

Read this somewhere:

"Conscience is the root of all true courage, for courage without conscience is a wild beast. If a man would be brave, let him obey his conscience so that he'll do the right things than just merely doing things right. With courage, he will then dare to take risks, have the strength to be compassionate, and the wisdom to be humble. Courage is foundation of integrity and conscience."

Lol does it make sense at all...

time management

2009-01-18T21:44:00.003+08:00

Ehh. I was at dental. And I happened to see this:

:: four Ds of time management ::

delete

delay

diminish

delegate

Nothing quite spectacular or original... But I found it pretty neat haha.

anality

2009-01-18T21:33:00.002+08:00

Lol I first heard the word "anality" at a lunch session with Mr Lim and Tim Chow. I'm not sure if such a word exists, but to my understanding anality is simply the quality of being anal.

I've read some text lately; and it is quite amusing how the originator of the text did not quite take the effort to proofread and proofread and proofread.

One. A banner promoting some courses taught by a particular centre/somebody (I'm not sure which). One of the courses offered- Hanyu Pingying

Two. "Our organisation advocates a strong and open learning culture where competing ideas flourish, while knowledge created is restrained and pervasively shared." I think the author meant "retained" instead of "restrained"...

Excuse me for my anality, if any :p

yawning cools the brain, dude

2008-12-16T12:57:00.002+08:00

Seems like I've given in to societal pressure :p No lah actually I happened to find this online and I thought it was interesting. Keep yawning people!

Why we yawn: To cool our brains
Contagious yawning may have evolved to keep group of people alert

By Jennifer Viegas

If your head is overheated, there's a good chance you'll yawn soon, according to a new study that found the primary purpose of yawning is to control brain temperature.

The finding solves several mysteries about yawning, such as why it's most commonly done just before and after sleeping, why certain diseases lead to excessive yawning, and why breathing through the nose and cooling off the forehead often stop yawning.

The key yawn instigator appears to be brain temperature.

"Brains are like computers," Andrew Gallup, a researcher in the Department of Biology at Binghamton University who led the study, told Discovery News. "They operate most efficiently when cool, and physical adaptations have evolved to allow maximum cooling of the brain."

He and colleagues Michael Miller and Anne Clark analyzed yawning in parakeets as representative vertebrates because the birds have relatively large brains, live wild in Australia, which is subject to frequent temperature swings, and, most importantly, do not engage in contagious yawning, as humans and some other animals do.

Contagious yawning is thought to be an evolved mechanism for keeping groups alert so they "remain vigilant against danger," Gallup said.

For the bird study, the scientists exposed parakeets to three different conditions: increasing temperature, high temperature and a control temperature. While yawning did not increase during the latter two conditions, it more than doubled when the researchers increased the bird's ambient temperature.

A paper on the findings has been accepted for publication in the journal Animal Behavior.

"Based on the brain cooling hypothesis, we suggest that there should be a thermal window in which yawning should occur," Gallup said. "For instance, yawning should not occur when ambient temperatures exceed body temperature, as taking a deep inhalation of warm air would be counterproductive. In addition, yawning when it is extremely cold may be maladaptive, as this may send unusually cold air to the brain, which may produce a thermal shock."

The parakeets yawned as predicted.

It's now believed yawning operates like a radiator for birds and mammals.

If air in the atmosphere is cooler than brain and body temperatures, taking it in quickly cools facial blood that, in turn, cools the brain and may even alter blood flow. Prior studies reveal yawning leads to a heightened state of arousal, so a morning yawn may function somewhat like a cup of coffee in providing a jolt of energy.

The new findings also explain why tired individuals often yawn, since both exhaustion and sleep deprivation have been shown to increase deep brain temperatures, again prompting a yawn-driven cool down. Yawning additionally appears to facilitate transitional states of the brain, such as going from sleep to waking periods.

Gordon Gallup, Jr., a State University of New York at Albany psychologist, did not work on the study, but, as Andrew Gallup's father, paid close attention to the research. The senior Gallup also happens to be a leading expert on the science of yawning and other widespread evolved traits.

"It is interesting to note that instances of excessive yawning in humans may be indicative of brain cooling problems," Gallup, Jr., told Discovery News, pointing out that patients with multiple sclerosis often experience bouts of excessive yawning "and MS involves thermoregulatory dysfunction."

He added, "Bouts of excessive yawning often precede the onset of seizures in epileptic patients, and predict the onset of headaches in people who suffer from migraines."

In the future, researchers may focus more on brain temperature and its role in diseases and their symptoms. But the new study on yawning changes the popular notion that yawns are mere signs of boredom.

On the contrary, as Gallup said, "yawning more accurately reflects a mechanism that maintains attention, and therefore should be looked at as a compliment!"

© 2008 Discovery Channel

stop and stare

2008-06-08T14:56:00.002+08:00

by OneRepublic

This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shakin off the rust
I've got my heart set on anywhere but hereI
'm staring down myself, counting up the years

Steady hands, just take the wheel
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal
For the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh

Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can u see what I see

They're tryin to come back, all my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags, I never thought I could
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, you don't need

What u need, what u need...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh, do u see what I see

One of the songs I've grown to like lately haha...

Haven't been around here for long! Just needed to tell myself to take some time to take stock of myself after the upcoming exercise.

Yeapp haha.

heylo ppl!

2008-04-27T08:25:00.001+08:00

Haha I wonder how everybody is doing... Haven't been talking to people much...

If you read this please tag! :)

the apple

2008-04-20T13:13:00.006+08:00

Is officially my favourite fruit now :) Everytime I book out I will eat 5-6 apples (I'd say at least :p) over the weekend I think... Its like crunchy and juicy. Sometimes its sour sometimes its sweet. But in both cases its nice :)

bye again lol

2008-03-23T23:46:00.003+08:00

Right. After the really short block leave, I'll be reporting to my new unit tomorrow.

Yepp. I must admit I don't really know what to expect from OCS heh... I'm looking forward to the things that I'll learn, yet I'm not really confident if I'll be a good and able officer. Wonder how I'll turn out...

Time to sleep now. Good night! And see you all soon everyone!

walk walk

2008-03-19T10:56:00.002+08:00

I like to walk :) Just walked back from the doctor's just now. Somehow walking slows down the whole pace at which the day moves... And it lets your mind breathe and wander as well heh. Unless you're doing route march or forced-pace walking :p It's like when I take a bus or MRT or car or tonner from point to point the journey seems to be so fast and hurried (Tonner is special lol for that it's because we are all shagged when we board the tonner after training and stuff...) Unless it's a really really long journey lol.

Oh... Perhaps what I really like is the control over the pace of my journey :)

sighh

2008-03-18T22:58:00.002+08:00

I was going to grrr but i'm in a sighh-ly mood now thinking about the following incident:

This afternoon I was at Dhoby Ghaut MRT taking the train to City Hall to meet the 4L people to go to Sakae Sushi for our gathering then the train came and as usual there were many people boarding so they board board board and they never move in so I got stranded outside the train the door closed the train left and I waited 7 minutes for the next one.

Sighh. I cannot understand why people don't move in to make space for other people... Not only in MRTs also I think. Oh well.

The other day I missed a train also but haha that was just plain silly :p

heylo. block leave haha

2008-03-16T17:17:00.002+08:00

Yepps. I'm back from BMT haha. POPed on Wed in the rain. Poor next batch who will be inheriting the most likely rusty rifles...

Block leave is really short... I have engaged in a lot of eating and I foresee more eating :p Gatherings and stuff mainly lol... It's nice to catch up with people, be it baldies or hairies :p Have to get myself exercising again though or else suffer when I get posted to my new vocation.

BMT was quite an experience... It was not particularly life-changing or super memorable (bits of it will be lol), but it sure impacted me in little ways. I have gained some erm... insight to the chain of command as well yes...

I've always told myself to try to make the best of the two years of NS, so I hope the vocation I get into is one which I won't be sian of. Hope to be able to stretch and challenge myself, learn and grow :)

Ahh but one thing I always feel when I book in to camp is sian-ness and tiredness... Takes me about one night to get over it haha. Anybody got any tips to overcome this? Might become really sian to feel the sian-ness and tiredness each time I book in haha.

I now know why army boys always talk about army stuff when they gather. Because that is our life... We have practically nothing else to talk about, given that we have 5 days in-camp training and less than 2 days out-camp slacking. Oh well too bad :p

Waiting for 21st Mar now. Postings will be out then. I never thought I would bother so much about it but I am lol. Oh there's something else I remember about this day also, something which I've stupidly forgotten for the past two months... haha.

bye byee

2008-01-10T20:57:00.000+08:00

Haha I'm going into NS, going into Tekong tomorrow.

I don't really have much to say, just wondering (as I always have) whether I'll change... :p

I took today at a very slow, comfortable pace. Woke up late, packed my stuff at my own time, watched Moulin Rouge (haha thanks Jing Zhong! it's really nice), went on to MSN just to talk too.

And from tomorrow onwards body (and mind I hope, I realise I've become very lazy :p) got to start working hard again. Haha.

See you all!

the air force invitation card

2007-12-20T21:31:00.000+08:00

Oh I forgot to mention.

One night I was playing with the RSAF invitation card (to some scholarship talk) and decided to check out the circuit. Haha it was quite cool.

I took pictures but I'm lazy to upload. And I don't think the pictures help much in explaining also haha.

Initially there's this thin plastic slip with a hole in it. The non-hole area of the plastic slip is in between two metal contacts and hence cuts the circuit off. When you open the card, you actually pull this plastic slip such that the metal contacts come in contact (at the hole) and the circuit is connected. When you close the card, the plastic slip goes back in between the two contacts.

Okiee. That's all :p

harlow!

2007-12-20T21:22:00.000+08:00

Lol I haven't been blogging for a really really long time...

Lately I've not been doing much. Its weird considering how I have this list of all the things I want to do and yet I don't have the mood to do them. Much inertia lol.

At least I started exercising again (though today's soccer was a flop, we went to Wei Song's house to play Wii lol) and started reading again (somewhat).

Been talking to people quite a bit online also haha. They may not know this but thanks for helping me pass the time hehe.

Oh my I sound really really sad... but I'm not :) Just a little sian at times that's all. It's kind of like this: I feel a bit aimless now yet I know that I'm not (or at least I think I'm not :p). I feel a little sian now yet I know there are a lot of things waiting for me to do and I wouldn't be sian if I did them.

Weirdd. Lol.

Ohh. Plus I think it's time to start reflecting again. Heh. Today Yip talked to me on MSN and we somehow got to RI and RJC. And it got me thinking again. Stupid Yip :p

Hope everyone's doing well! Haha in case I don't blog again anytime soon, merry christmas!

weird dreams

2007-11-17T19:47:00.000+08:00

Haha I have been having weird dreams lately. I wonder what they mean ah o.O

Maybe dreams can be a source of innovation hor... Haha. My wonderful toilet seat :P

This morning when I was walking out of school with Wei Song and Adrian I thought of this long and really really powerful fan which blows upwards and props you up such that you could sleep hovering in air! You know, like those round fans you see at promotions and there's a ball hovering it heh...

Today I was packing up most of my stuff too... Chem and Econs and Math all filed up nicely now (the files are bursting pretty badly...) Come to think of it I think I will feel quite lost after the As - like Yong Chun said. Need to think how to spend the holidays wisely and fruitfully, and also think a lot a lot more about the future now...

Heh I think this is going to sound silly. I was packing and packing then I had this wave of nostalgia. Strange arh... Look at notes also nostalgic :P maybe it's because of the good times we had in class and in study group :)

Oh and my brother and I went to get a flu jab today... Haha first time I saw the needle penetrating the skin. Its like. Poke. Go deeper. Inject. Take out. Not as scary as I used to think it was :P

And I should go read up more about dreams :)

caution!

2007-11-07T00:41:00.001+08:00

Heh. Went to hospital to see Mr Ong today with some Chorale people. He looked very jing1 shen2 haha good good. Think he can be discharged soon.

There was this kerb I saw when we were walking to the main entrance of the hospital, and there was a sign painted on the kerb saying "Caution! Blah blah..". I found it pretty non-common-sensical leh. In the first place you trip over the kerb because you didnt notice it, so then why put the "caution" sign there...?

Haha can somebody please explain.

见鬼

2007-11-04T07:59:00.000+08:00

Lol Lewis and I had a ghostly encounter in the lift.

It all started with Daniel Yip who abandoned us to go to the canteen to study. I got a little hungry in the late afternoon and wanted to see if Stall2 was open; Lewis tagged along to visit Daniel Yip.

Being lazy people we took the lift down. All was well.

Being lazy people we took the lift back up. This time, we heard a voice. The voice said, "Lewis Tan and Wen Hao... Lewis Tan and Wen Hao... Lewis Tan and Wen Hao please respond......"

We were quite freaked out. I thought I was hallucinating but Lewis heard it too, so I couldn't have... Could it be that a ghost was feeling lonely and wanted to talk to us? Being the brave people that we are we decided to take the lift again and see if the ghost still lingered around.

But it was gone.

We were thinking thinking, mebbe its the Daniel Yip who abandoned us who played a prank on us... So we decided to send a recon party consisting of Junxin and Ramona to go and sound Daniel Yip out. But he was equally stunned. Could it be?

In the meantime Wan Ling walked into the wrong classroom again. For the second time... Could it be it?

We were stunned. Daniel Yip even called me to explain his innonence. It seemed like it wasn't him... But if it wasn't Daniel Yip, could there be some other super bo liao person trying to play a prank on us? If there was, who could it be?

Or was there... it?

Undeterred by the err-i-dont-know-wat-lah-watever-thing-which-was-supposed-to-deter-us, we embarked on a hunt. (Actually it was just time for dinner so Lewis and I went down to 7-11 to get dinner) And we found it.

---insert---
We also found our free dinner... 3 Nasi Bryanis 1 Smoked Chicken Burger and 1 Black Pepper Beef Burger. A bit a lot ah... Free dinner was provided by 7-11. Some of the food was expiring in 2 or 3 days time so the Indian lady said we could have it for free. For those who are concerned with our health, we are fine haha. No stomachache or anything :p
---end---

Who is it? Find out by asking Lewis, Wan Ling, Junxin, Ramona or me. While stocks last.

self-study

2007-10-23T21:16:00.000+08:00

I have this thought.

Recently I have been going to school almost everyday to study with some class people (a lot! lol) and just now on my way home I thought...

Maybe we can carry out self-study for the whole year? Like. Collect lecture notes and tutorial. Go through at your own pace in school. Do and submit. Got questions consult teachers (who might not have anything else to do in this system...)

The big plus point is studying at your own pace. Of course there has to be tests and all those periodically to make sure you aren't studying too slowly... There might also be more ownership with regard to learning. But I guess the individual needs to be disciplined and have some sort of self-motivation as well.

But then, what would the teachers do? Lol.

AD-AS

2007-10-07T15:52:00.000+08:00

Ehh. Lol some random thing :P

For the purposes of the following essay, AD shall refer to academic demand, and AS shall refer to academic supply. They can be represented on an AD-AS diagram as follows:

The interaction of academic demand and academic supply results in an equilibrium level of stress S. (Ehh I don't know what's on the horizontal axis)

Now, academic demand AD is affected by factors such as quantity and difficulty of work. Factoes affecting academic supply include critical and creative thinking.

These factors of AD and AS can result in the shifting of the AD and AS curves. A possible scenario is depicted in the diagram below:

In this scenario, AD increased from AD0 to AD1 and AS increased from AS0 to AS1. However, AD increased by a greater extent than AS - this leads to a higher stress level S1.

One wonders about the appropriate macroeconomic policy to reduce the stress level. It seems like one has no control over AD, and hence can only seek to expand AS to cope with the increase in AD.

sometimes.

2007-09-28T19:32:00.000+08:00

Got the other one back today. Quite relieved it turned out well lol.

Got to work harder work harder.

sometimes

2007-09-27T15:22:00.000+08:00

Lol maybe it's not "right" for me to be saying this. But well. Got to let it off. Heh.

It really sucks when you don't get what you want, had worked for, and really thought would get. I guess the disappointment just compounds itself. And snowballs as you think back on each of these stages.

But me being me, haha, will always ask myself. What went wrong and where? Perhaps I had not worked for it hard enough. Perhaps the method was wrong. Perhaps, there is no perhaps.

Heh so I guess I just got to try to do better next time.

There's this one more coming back soon. So I shall see lahh.

messed up translations

2007-09-02T14:26:00.001+08:00

Hee. Newspapers seem to be getting more and more interesting.

why good notes may not be so good

2007-09-01T16:22:00.000+08:00

Mhmm.

When the notes given to you are too good (for instance, everything is presented succintly, concise and clear, in aesthetically pleasing layouts or arrangements) there is little incentive to personalise your notes - that is, to make it your own. You could be making your own notes, you could be scribbling little additional points, and so on.

The value in personalisation lies first in the fact that it requires the use of several skills. Re-arrangement of information into a more useful format eg. from paragraphs to tables requires categorical thinking, synthesis, or some other skill involving evaluation of the information you are given. Derivation of meaningful linkages on your own eg. figuring out cause-and-effect relationships which your notes don't explain too clearly, forces you to really think. And could help you reach new insights or greater clarity.

I think the act of personalisation helps in knowledge retention as well. Making notes for yourself, for instance, forces you to consider the information at your disposal, and so it gets into your head a bit more. And the "painful" act of making notes makes it all the more memorable too.

Then there's the thing about self-discovery too. I think that discovering things for yourself is a learning method with perhaps one of the highest retention rates. It's the sense of "I managed to find it out by myself" (or in groups, "We managed to find it out by ourselves") - more time and effort invested perhaps, but because of that, greater ownership as well. Plus there's the satisfaction, the sense of achievement.

Practice is another method with a high retention rate. I think what it does is it "forces" you to remember. And to maximise practice, it's got to be meaningful as well. Practice fills in the gaps in your knowledge. You get to know what you know, and what you don't know. And after the practice, you now know a little more.

Oops. Sorry for the digression. Heh. So what good notes do is that they reduces the incentive for you to personalise - if it's so good already, what for try to make it better for yourself? The key words here are really "for yourself" - different people prefer, for instance, different ways of presenting information.

But because the key words here are "for yourself", that should give us some sort of impetus to personalise, to add value to the notes, for the benefit of ourselves. And personalisation isn't about blindly adding what others say - one way or another it's got to go through you. You could process what others say before adding it in; you could add in something which you thought of yourself.

So I think good notes given to you, may not be so good for you.

Lol I don't know if I make sense. Heh. A bit drained now from a few hours of Econs.

Oh yeah today is 1 Sep. Happy Teachers Day! Then again I kind of hope no teacher hangs around here though. That would be quite... scary? Lol

how to beat roger federer

2007-08-31T22:13:00.000+08:00

Heh. Thought this was quite amusing.

telecoms

2007-08-29T22:45:00.000+08:00

This is from an article from the Economist, sometime back:

"Next, despite much talk of “convergence” within the industry, people are in fact using different communications technologies in distinct and divergent ways. The fixed-line phone “is the collective channel, a shared organisational tool, with most calls made 'in public' because they are relevant to the other members of the household,” she says. Mobile calls are for last-minute planning or to co-ordinate travel and meetings. Texting is for “intimacy, emotions and efficiency”. E-mail is for administration and to exchange pictures, documents and music. Instant-messaging (IM) and voice-over-internet calls are “continuous channels”, open in the background while people do other things. “Each communication channel is performing an increasingly different function,” says Ms Broadbent."

Haha quite cool. Being a sociologist may be interesting ehh?

And does the picture below look like its taken from some computer game?

It's actually a forest fire in Greece. Came out in yesterday's papers.

thought of the day

2007-08-28T16:53:00.000+08:00

If you and a stranger were standing in the rain, you with an umbrella and he without, would you offer to share it with him?

hello kitty

2007-08-25T09:58:00.000+08:00

Lol this is a newspaper article from some time back... Haha it really tickles :P

sources of stress

2007-08-05T09:09:00.000+08:00

Haha this might be a bit heavy for the morning but heck.

It just occurred to me that there are so many sources of stress. One is when you have too many things to do/on your mind, another is when you don't know what to do about the things you have to do, and yet another is when others expect you to do them well.

And there are probably many many many more.

For me, I think the main source of stress is when I don't know what I have to do. When I don't know what the problem is. When I don't know what's expected of me.

That's not to say that I'm not affected by the other sources. Haha. Especially the one where I don't know what to do about the things that I know I have to do. But not knowing what I have to do is no.1 source of stress for me.

(Ohh btw, I'm not stressed or anything. Just my mind taking a little stroll, wandering around. On the contrary I've been pretty happy lately. Haha.)

army food is good

2007-08-01T04:40:00.000+08:00

Lol wanted to post a little something about cool experience at the NDU Camp at Sembawang. So there.

Umm. Toilet posters were amusing as well. Hoses and pumps. And there was this motivational poster about patience at the medical centre where we had to wait. And wait. And wait.

It was quite sian actually. A lot of waiting around. Think have to go back again for an actual dive test.

Lol in case you're wondering what I'm doing at this ungoldly hour. I kind of dozed off doing S6 tutorial and woke up an hour ago. Haha.

cold

2007-07-28T10:02:00.000+08:00

Brrr it's been super cold every single day of this week. Wake up freezing every morning and it doesn't help to have a hot water shower to defrost cos shiver shiver again after coming out of the shower.

Haha maybe it's time to start using the blanket. All this while I've been sleeping on it.

Anyway yesterday afternoon I saw this taxi which caters to the needs of the physically handicapped. It's much bigger in size, and it has room for a wheelchair to fit. So there's no need to fold up the wheelchair and keep in the boot. Was pleasantly surprised as I had never seen one before on the streets. Haha.

Oh and now there's this men's boutique on the ground floor of Capital Tower, just beside the main entrance to the offices. Maybank used to occupy the area. It's quite an... interesting location. Convenient I suppose, and probably quite a bit of advertisement for the brand just by having the boutique there since there's this huge office crowd. But a bit weird. Will people step in to buy? Lol I don't know.

Hmmm. Sembawang Naval Base next Mon. I wonder how things will go. I've heard its a 12hr thing lol.

marche

2007-07-27T21:18:00.000+08:00

Went to Marche at Vivocity with Mr Seah, Yip, David, James and Amanda last night. Wahh it was a great way to end the super long Thurs. We spent quite a bit at Marche and Ben & Jerry's after that but heck. It was a very enjoyable dinner.

During the ride there we talked a lot about army stuff. Haha what to do. Four boys squeezing in the back of Mr Seah's car talking away, leaving poor Amanda in front probably very bored. I was saying like many people say go army and slack, but I think somewhere inside, most of us would want to do a little something if we get the opportunity lah. And not waste the two years there.

The ride back was more interesting for everyone :P Too bad Yip wasn't there.

Because I didn't study for Econs test, today turned out pretty well. Though I'm pretty sure I won't score high or anything. Anyway this week has been pretty crazy. Physics was on Tues (Mr Sze say we did badly, but I think for me it's no time, plus stupid careless mistakes) and Chem and GP essay was on Thurs, which were quite bad as well. Ah well.

I wanted to say something about inertia. Measure of the reluctance to move from lazy state to driven state. Is human willpower really able to overcome all odds? Or can man perform optimally only when placed in the correct environment?

It seems to me that the second is the case. And that suggests that man is constrained by his environment, that it takes a good match between man and environment (whose components may include other people) to produce optimal performance. Yet it may merely be case of insufficiently strong willpower. Theoretically, willpower might be able to overcome all odds. But realistically, not many have willpower that strong.

What to strive for, then? An understanding of what fits who and sharpness in identifying a good fit, or mental tenacity and strength of will?

me to me: pls slp

2007-07-18T05:20:00.000+08:00

This is a really weird time to be blogging. Haha and it's a really weird thing I'm blogging too. But I don't know why I tend to feel tired very early at night. And I wake up really early in the morning (today was 4am btw).

Bleah I don't like this o.o

I've been wanting to say something about some new word I learnt on Friday but I can't remember how to spell it. And I've been wanting to say something about something else which I can't really remember also.

Btw I didn't know they removed the angsana tree just outside RJ (near the basketball courts) already. That's pretty quick... And yesterday my sister discovered that bus number 13 now boasts a double-decker fleet. Heh won't be so squeezy anymore I hope.

self-sufficiency

2007-07-08T00:27:00.001+08:00

Is a queer thing.

It's something not quite realisable, I realised. There's always this little part in everyone which seeks the company of others. This little part which is always in need of others.

Well well.

non-luxury counterfeits

2007-06-17T10:34:00.000+08:00

http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/06/15/business/fake.php?page=1

Well this is really quite scary since the product itself being fake might turn out to be quite dangerous. Health hazards and all.

queer

2007-06-14T00:38:00.000+08:00

Mhmm I seem to be more driven and able to study at night. Lol.

Might be the accumulated guilt from having done close to nothing in the day. Or maybe its the absence of noise, and other distractions, when everyone else is sleeping.

But cannot lah. Don't want to turn nocturnal.

And whatever it is, home just doesn't seem to be a good place to study. Haha I wonder why it turned out like that; I used to do just fine staying at home. About 1 week left! Lots more to go.

Good night world.

certification

2007-06-07T17:27:00.001+08:00

Heh. Thought this was quite amusing:

http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/06/06/opinion/edkumiko.php

to bintan and back

2007-06-03T21:24:00.000+08:00

Mhmm I was going to blog this earlier. But had gastral inflammation (or something like that) on Wed night - damn scary, on the ferry back I told Xinyin I felt like puking lol I didn't mean it then but there was this persistent stomachache. It didn't subside at all for the rest of the evening. Eventually vomitted at night and went to see doctor at 1130; rested whole of Thurs, and decided to collate some stuff for handover on Fri and Sat (amidst other stuff). So here I am now.

First and foremost must say it went better than I expected. I think back to last year's camp, and honestly I don't recall any impact the J2s had on me... Wonder if it's my memory or they weren't that involved last year (both facilitation and running the activity). So I didn't really expect to be doing much this year as a J2.

But it turned out that we did quite a bit. Don't know what the other's did, but for David, James, Yip and Amanda and me I think we did quite a bit of facilitation. Sharing of personal experience. That kind of stuff. All in the hope of guiding the new J1s. Was definitely meaningful; only hope now is that they took it seriously at camp and take it back from camp too.

At least. Don't forget lah. Why I say this is because during the faciliation it struck me that I've known all these stuff about drive, expecting more (in fact, expecting things out of people), leadership, working with people and so on, but somehow many of these things didn't really manifest during my term. Which further struck me as perculiar. Maybe we just need reminders from others (especially those with experience) once in a while. Even if its just once in a long while.

In a way the camp was a refresher for me too - not only about my personal beliefs about leadership, but also in the fact that I am interested in things like this. Student leadership, school issues... Probably lost sight of it because of interests in other stuff and probably also because I thought there weren't many like-minded people around. Similar to what I told Yip about RJ being intellectually unsatisfying. That 3hr talk we had from 1130pm to 230am (or something like that) about council was really something.

I just hope something good turns out of it. The talk is important as a first step - what follows is even more important. People might dismiss talk, render it useless: they always say action more important than talk. But sometimes we keep reminding oursleves of one extreme to the extent that we forget the other - that we need to talk first before action. It's the same for many other things, like: It's the process that counts, not the end - but how can the process mean something if the end doesn't mater?

Which is why I think for many things we must take them in context.

Heh but I digress. I just hope that councillors - in fact, everyone - realise that in order to improve, we must first acknowledge that there is something wrong with ourselves. Drop the defense. Listen to the criticism. Assess it. And then do something about it. And I hope the bunch of us who were there at the talk could really do more (in our own ways perhaps) to guide the new batch of CCALs (perhaps those from our own CCA) and not only reshape council.

Got to know a lot of J1s during the camp. Lol I think I still remember most, if not all, of the names of people in the D groups. I really hope we made an impact on the J1s, though I really don't know. Had no idea how the 25 of us J2s did as a batch.

Got to know some teachers better too. I surprised myself with my ability at some small talk. Haha. And I surprised myself with my ability to break the ice pretty fast with all the D groups I took, because I didn't know a lot of them. Well well, so much for an introvert. Maybe I'm an extrovert by choice, and introvert by nature.

Got to know David, James, Yip and Amanda better too. Interesting people. Haha. Mr Seah too :P Don't think I'll ever forget the pinky velvet and stuff.

I guess that does it then. Some sort of closure for CCAL camp.

Lately I've been thinking about the value of an alumni - what alumni can contribute, and how. Mhmm. Haha. Maybe I should get back to studying soon. But really, there's something in me which tells me this holidays should be spent a little more meaningfully. I don't know. Lol. There'll be quite a lot of things going on and I would hate to interrupt my studying. Mhmm.

learning

2007-06-02T08:08:00.000+08:00

Something interesting from a newspaper article:

"It is becoming harder to find a place where learning, as opposed to "education" and "training", is the main goal.

Training prepares the student in knowledges that constitute an occupation or a particular set of skills. For the most part, graduate schools train students to enter a profession.

Education prepares the student to take her place in society in a manner consistent with its values and beliefs. Whatever content the school delivers, the point is to help the student adapt to the prevailing order, not assimilate its values in terms of her own priorities and interests."

(from The Knowledge Factory by Stanley Aronowitz)

geylang at cannes

2007-05-26T12:40:00.000+08:00

http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/05/25/arts/singfest.php

Haha it's interesting how Geylang made it to Cannes Film Festival... probably made Singapore more known to the world too. Lol.

standards

2007-05-26T00:53:00.000+08:00

I've got this feeling that I've lost some sense of standard. But I've also got this feeling that I'll able to find it back. Mhmmm.

Lots of things we can do if we believe that we can. That's optimism for you :)

And I still dont' know why I don't feel like sleeping. Hmmm.

plane geometry

2007-05-25T00:48:00.000+08:00

Bleah. I think I'll fail this one. I can't remember if the questions I did add up to enough marks for me to pass in the first place... Hmmm.

Need more time... and also need to develop a kind of intuition. Such that when you see a problem, you kind of know what you need to use. Comes with practice I guess.

But anyway, after H3 test went for soccer finals. Haven't been at a sporting event for some time already... so the feeling of just being there with the rest, be it cheering your hearts out or just watching the match, was quite a refreshing one. And this was one match where I wasn't in front waving the flag or leading cheers... so quite different also.

I always felt a lack of passion for RJ (not that I felt super a lot for RI but more lah) and I don't have that school spirit in me, if it does exist. Today rekindled that. A bit. Haha.

Ended the day with TIMBRE. I don't quite understand how people can eat with rock bands screaming or shouting away. But well. Maybe we're not supposed to. Lol. There wasn't enough food! And not enough drinks also :( Everybody limited to one free drink. So we went to Mos Burger at Raffles City after TIMBRE and I had a large ice peach tea.

I'm doing my 3 best achievements now. Getting used to the 3rd person already. Lol.

3 best achievements

2007-05-21T21:41:00.000+08:00

Again, I feel as if the things I've achieved can't be documented in that little template the school gave us. It's so much more intangible; and not things you would put on a cert anyway.

Or maybe I haven't really achieved anything at all. Haha.

I've done quite a bit of self-discovery in my 2 years here; through reflection, through random thoughts, through leadership, through working with people, through observing people, through idle chatter, through cheem conversations. Lol.

I've made a lot more mistakes in my 2 years here as well; and as a consequence I've learnt quite a bit. Some people say you don't need to make mistakes to learn - you can learn from others' mistakes. But for me, the experience is unique, and true understanding (and appreciation) can be forged by experience only.

I've had valuable friendships in my 2 years here; have got to know more people, have got to deepen my understanding of people. Have felt more attached to people. Lol. Might not sound like much, but for one who came out from secondary school lamenting that social circles change once the environment changes and didn't make an effort to hold on to them, this means a lot.

Maybe these aren't achievements, I don't know. But its important to me :)

I must admit I didn't take part in many non-academic school activities (which are supposed to enrich you). Mainly Chorale, the occasional talk, the occasional CIP. Probably why I'm so stuck over my 3 best achievements. But I like to think that I've been enriched in different aspects, areas which I was lacking in.

Haha sounds like some end-of-year reflection already. Oops. It just flowed I guess. I'd like to talk to people one day and see how far we've all come in these 2 years, what we've gained, what we've learnt. And perhaps, whether we could have squeezed more out of these 2 years.

I don't think many people will be in the mood to though. So I probably have to keep it to myself. Reflect myself. Haha. Blame myself for preoccupying myself with such things all the time.

hmmmz

2007-04-14T12:29:00.000+08:00

Gee I'm back into last minute work. Don't really like it.

But somehow it hasn't "failed" me yet, so I think that's why I'm still stuck in it. Hmm. Got to break out of it! Not going to be very healthy.

Anyways, all the best to all of us for Concert later. At this stage, a lot of things is really mental and psychological rather than technical... it's a lot about getting into the right frame of mind. So don't worry so much ppl :) Think well, feel well and we'll do well.

man without words

2007-04-06T15:46:00.000+08:00

Hmmm. I like that :)

There's this other thing about being like steel. Rock solid tough, yet malleable. I like that too :)

stress relief

2007-04-04T00:33:00.000+08:00

The most effective form of stress relief, is knowing that you're not alone in facing the problems. It is in knowing that you can really count on the competence of others to solve things with you when you find yourself stuck.

Perhaps this is why most people get stressed over and over again. Most of the time the stress relief they receive is but a painkiller. You take it and you feel good. But it doesn't eliminate the cause of the pain. So you get haunted by the pain.

Because such competent people are really rare. People who seem to know what to do and keep their cool no matter what happens. Are really rare.

I wanted to be someone like that, and to some extent I really thought I could be. Indomitable pillar of support. But well.

Haha. Feel a bit like an RJ pillar now. Kind of hollow.

I need to fill myself. And I will fill myself. Got to at least keep standing.

o.o

2007-03-22T23:30:00.000+08:00

Somehow, today didn't feel like a very good day. Not that anything really went horribly wrong, but it just didn't feel like a good day. Haha I don't know if I make sense, but it's just this unsettledness which keeps bugging me, as though something might happen soon. Or something.

Maybe it's just restlessness. Been growing since this morning. I didn't do much this morning, kind of whiled the time away; stoned around for a few hours after I came back from school this afternoon too.

Then there's bit of dread as well. Not at the Chem CT (haha but it turned out pretty dreadful anyway) but seemingly at something else. Maybe at things to come. Can't pinpoint what it is though.

And I couldn't really concentrate on Physics too, not to mention before Chem I wasn't really focussed as well. My mind kept jumping to other stuff. Hmm. So much 杂念.

See how tomorrow lah.

singapore biathlon 2007

2007-03-17T22:03:00.000+08:00

1.5km swim in the sea followed by a 10km run in East Coast Park... Haha must say it's been a great experience. I'll go for another biathlon if I have the chance to.

Woke up pretty early this morning to go to East Coast Park. Thought we (my brother and I) were early but by the time we got there there were a lot of people there already. Met up with another 2 of his friends before we went to get ourselves registered.

The guy at the registration counter was stunned to see my EZ-link card. Haha. I didn't have my racr slip with me so had to use that as proof of identity, and I told him I didn't believe people believe that was me too... So much for using the EZ-link card as identity proof during exams.

While waiting for flag off we hanged around in the transition area, doing some stretching and stuff. Went for a dip in the sea as well, and I realised I couldn't really see anything underwater. Swimming front crawl was a bit disorienteering as well (might be the current) so breast stroke it was. Ohh and the mobile toilets really CMI. I think all the taps don't work o.O

Haha I saw Mr Chng and 2 female PE teachers there as well. Like so cool... Think I saw another RJ person and some RI ppl there as well.

The swim wasn't exactly very enjoyable... Lol. There was a lot of jostling and kicking (not kick the water but kick the ppl...) in the water and my goggles fogged up very quickly so I really couldn't see anything. Just followed the heads bobbing up and down... haha. And I suspect all the jostling might have led me to cramp up quicker than I thought... When I got out of the sea I started cramping already. Stumble stumble on the sand back to the transition area. Lol.

The run was somewhat better. Though I think I was kinda spent during the swim so I held on at a comfortable pace for about 5km only. After that it was run-walk-run-walk... Haiz. But I never really train for this thing and my long-distance running not very good also so not bad lah haha.

To be honest I never imagined the 1.5km swim and 10km run to feel so short... I was a bit apprehensive at first but the thing is when you actually start doing it it's not that bad... Plus there are so many other people around so you don't feel that sian or lonely also.

This time I took part was more of a "play play look see" thing... But I must say when you cross the finish line there is this feeling of satisfaction. It's something intrinsic... just the feeling of "Yes, I did it." After all, who do you run for other than yourself? Especially for people like me who aren't aiming for the top, haha.

But the next time I go for one I'll take it more seriously and try to improve my time. Otherwise the intrinsic reward won't be there anymore... Now that I know I can complete it, the next time I go I'll want to know what else I'm capable of. Haha maybe one day I'll go for marathon :P

Today when I was running something struck me also. Haha. Some people say life is like a marathon, but I don't really think so. If only life could be like a marathon - where we focus on one objective and are preoccupied with only one thing in mind for the whole race. But more often than not we've got so many things on our mind.

So maybe life should be like a x-athlon, x representing the number of things one sets out to accomplish. And this x-athlon is special in that you can repeat legs eg. run then swim then run again. So you breakdown the many things on your mind into smaller-size tasks and tackle them bit by bit.

And of course you must have water checkpoints along the way. Sometimes walk a bit during the run or float around during the swim also not bad, especially if you really need it (like me :P). And when you start to cramp up, must remember to visit the nearest first-aid tent.

Ohh and after the event we slacked around... They were giving our free bananas and cocount-flavoured isotonic (which wasn't that bad) so we just took. All of the participants got a shirt and a finisher medal too which is pretty cool too. And another cool thing is we went to VJ to have a shower before going home :) I thought the VJ showers were so much better than the RJ ones... Doors which can be locked, more than one hook, a rack for soap too. But the shower itself was pretty weird, or at least mine was. It shot a jet of water at me (like water gun...) and I had to stand pretty far away from the showerhead as I couldn't adjust it. Four of us then headed to Parkway Parade for lunch before we went home. And once I hit home I went to sleep.

Which explains why I'm pretty awake now. So. I'm going to start on my Econs.

wat CTs

2007-03-15T21:36:00.000+08:00

Since Wed I have been adhering to a very strict routine of wake up in morning, go school and study (at a pretty relaxing and comfortable pace) until afternoon/evening, then go home and slack. How disciplined I am :)

It's nothing like last year's Promos where the studying was really intensive and draining. Now its just sian. Lol. And it's nothing like last year's Promos in that I can't recall what else I did other than study during the one month lead-up to Promos, but this hols I seem to be preoccupied with other stuff (like Chorale). I guess CTs aren't as important as Promos, so maybe that's why.

Get this feeling that CTs don't really matter to me. Hmmm. I'm thinking about things after CTs already. Oh well. But cannot do too badly I suppose. Haha.

overrated.

2007-03-14T21:00:00.000+08:00

I was telling someone I think I'm overrated. Lol.

Like sometimes I don't really know what's so good about me. Or why people have so much faith in me. Haha. It's not to say it's a bad thing, or it stresses me out or anything... It's just that I can't really make sense of it. Lol.

I think I said before that sometimes expectations from others can bring out the best in you, because there's this sincere belief from someone else that, hey, you can really do it. And that in itself is so much more real an encouragement... Maybe people don't realise that's what expectations really represent. Or maybe that's just how I see it. Haha.

Oh well. Just random musing again. In case you start wondering what prompted this post, the answer is NOTHING. :)

Mon's soccer session made me feel somewhat nostalgic. We were back at the D again, playing soccer. Reminded me of the caroling sessions last year, as well as those days back in RI where I would play soccer every Saturday afternoon with Jason Lau and gang... Haha. Was really great... play until always kena abrasion or blister, but was really fun. I really wouldn't mind playing soccer after Chorale every week or something. Heck care the hot sun :P

Tue's FRINGE lunch was pretty cool too. I think this is the first time Quan Quan joined us for a meal or something :P And we were just gossiping after lunch, though the J1s got no contribution wan. Haiz. Free riding.

Wed. Err. Nothing much today. Haha.

the economics of food

2007-03-11T18:34:00.000+08:00

Let us assume a 2-sector economy, comprising you who eats and they who cook for you to eat.

The consumption function shows the positive relationship between the amount of food they cook and the amount of food you eat. It consists of two components:

1. Autonomous consumption: the amount of food you eat which does not vary with the amount of food they cook

2. Food-induced consumption: the component of consumption which varies directly with the amount of food they cook

The diagram above illustrates the consumption function, which can be represented by C = a + bY. a represents autonomous consumption, while bY represents food-induced consumption.

APC and MPC are two important concepts which can be applied here as well. APC refers to the proportion of total food they cook which you actually eat, while MPC refers to the proprtion of extra food food they cook which you actually eat. In most cases, MPC represents greed :P

Greedy person

Not-so-greedy person

happiness

2007-03-08T23:11:00.000+08:00

Lol I had a lot of 感触 when I was doing the AQ yesterday during GP common test. Was a question about happiness, and whether prosperity and a better material life could contribute to happiness.

That's definitely not all there is to happiness, and I recall writing "finding companionship" and "sense of achievement" as contributors to happiness. In that order. Hmmm. Does that mean anything.

What happiness is is something I've always wanted to find out... At least, what it is for me. Life is about pursuing happiness, and yet what happiness entails differs from person to person, so it seems like it's really about exploration and discovery.

And then the thing is: when you've finally found it, what are you going to do with it? Haha. Random musing.

Eh I realise "finding companionship" sounds a bit funny. I meant friends ah. Lol.

And there's this article about messiness. This part is interesting: "What we need are flexible decision makers who can step outside the visions and schemes and plans to clealy see what's going on, and then make fast, on-the-fly calls about how to respond, while continuing to adapt those responses to changing conditions. A messy world calls for messy leaders."

Makes sense to me... nowadays things can be so unexpected that the most efficient way to settle things may not be to plan things in detail way ahead of time, but to keep certain ends in mind and be kept on alert for the random things that might pop up and respond to them quickly.

haiya.

2007-03-08T05:43:00.000+08:00

Not again.

aiyah.

2007-03-06T18:25:00.000+08:00

Feel very unsettled. Like I'm losing my steadiness... Hmmm.

argh.

2007-03-06T02:34:00.000+08:00

Darn I think I screwed up. Shouldn't have gone to sleep just now.

only you

2007-03-03T18:10:00.000+08:00

by (don't know who. oops :p)

Looking from a window above, it's like a story of love
Can you hear me?
Came back only yesterday I'm moving further away
Want you near me

All I needed was the love you gave
All I needed for another day
And all I ever knew
Only you

Sometimes when I think of her name when it's only a game
And I need you
Listen to the words that you say it's getting harder to stay
When I see you

All I needed was the love you gave
All I needed for another day
And all I ever knew
Only you

All I needed was the love you gave
All I needed for another day
And all I ever knew
Only you

This is going to take a long time and I wonder what's mine
Can't take no more
Wonder if you'll understand it's just the touch of your hand
Behind a closed door

All I needed was the love you gave
All I needed for another day
And all I ever knew
Only you

Prac today was good... Got some hair standing moments :) It's a very subtle thing, like suddenly you start to tremble a bit, or you feel little tinglings in your skin... Haha. I guess happy people make good sound.

Think the difference between Wed and Sat is that Wed is a long day... We come for prac all tired and exhausted from school (don't know why this is the case even though Wed is a short day... mebbe its PE for me :o) and the sound just dies during Wed prac. But on Sat, we come for prac all fresh and energetic, so much so that the sound is always way better on Sat.

FRINGE sounded cool today too! Though we are supposedly not very young... Lol. Old songs nice wat. Think today really testified to the fact that to get a good stable sound, we really need to practice practice practice... Non Vos and Duerme sounded so much more stable than All I Ask Of You or Only You, even though the other two are simpler. Same goes for all other songs I guess.

Hope the people who got the purple cards liked them... Worked on them with Jina yesterday... We had to avoid everybody, like we saw Jing Zhong and Ruth walking then we were like "Hide!"; and I had to tell everybody I was just slacking in school... Lol. Everybody 加油 :)

Haha I got a lot of things I want to type but they are popping up randomly... don't type already. Hmmm... and sometimes I wonder why I write about Chorale stuff also haha don't think a lot of Chorale ppl read... so it's more like self-gratification. Haha.

music

2007-02-28T23:30:00.000+08:00

Was browsing through The Straits Times just now (daily dosage of GP, haha) and saw this:

Music is not just about sound; it is about achievement in a larger human sense... Beyond all the pretty notes, we want creative engagement and communication from music, we want music to be a bridge to another personality.

singapore the air-conditioned nation

2007-02-26T20:53:00.000+08:00

by Cherian George

The above-mentioned book is basically a collection of essays written by Cherian George on politics in Singapore. I like his style of writing - clear and incisive. And sometimes he coins up interesting terms or uses interesting metaphors too which makes the book really enjoyable (though me being me, still took a very long time finish it)

But if you were to ask me to recite off what I've learnt, I probably won't be able to do so... Lol. So many essays in the book. So much content. Books like these are what I call content books (err... not very original... lol) which, if I feel they are useful, I would like to own and would not be satisfied with borrowing it and reading it once through. This one is my brother's so no problem with that. Lol.

Seems like the government of Singapore is really pretty uptight over control and a lot of the things they do (well, at least in the field of politics) are calculated. Good or bad I don't know... I've always been one who believes that there is value in control and being calculative. Hmmm.

But anyway now that I've finally finished this book, I can start on other books now... like the one Adrian gave me. Or maybe the one Hui Lin lent me. Or maybe the one I borrowed from Jing Zhong long time back... Haha.

Btw, must say thanks to Ramona for the cabbage today :) Have I said before how I don't mind belated birthday presents because they extend the birthday joy? Haha.

Edit: Wahh I realised I sent a lot of SMSes as I was typing this thing. Not to say there were a lot of things to settle but they are SMS-intensive :S

ehh. today.

2007-02-24T23:45:00.000+08:00

Prac today was pretty good... I actually had hair-standing moments when we sang O Magnum. Thats like. Wow. Haha. It's really quite rare you know... never really felt it before. But as so many people have pointed out, maybe it's just the song.

O Magnum by Busto is a really nice song. A lot of cool chords - I don't have much music background so the only way I can describe is cool... so ungratifying :S. The effect at the front part especially... as the music moves from bar to bar the whole colour shifts seamlessly with the chord changes.

Haha. Prac today didn't feel very long as well, was telling Chin Ee and Adrian that I felt like I've been singing for about only an hour... Don't know why also. Lol. And today I didn't feel super drained or exhausted by the end of prac as well... so funny. Haha. Maybe my techniques have finally gotten more secure. Or maybe not trying so hard really achieves more. Got a lot of maybes lah. Haha.

That's the thing about prac... I can't really seem to pinpoint why things happen (or don't happen) and it's really strange because then we become prone to fluctuation and we never really know what works and what does not.

Mr Toh said something very right today. It's hard to find any purpose in choral singing if we can't hear the things we create. And to want to create those things - that has definitely got to be our motivation.

Afternoon we had FRINGE prac. Discovered I can actually hit E now... Haha. As for our progress, it's still a little slow. To do well I think we need a lot of commitment - already we have much to work on for main Chorale repertoire, and on top of that we've still got to dedicate time to the small group - and of course that can only be sustainable if we are really interested in what we're doing.

It's actually easier for a small group to create overtone and have a clean sound. Because people cannot hide and cloud-ify the sound. Provided of course, we are confident in our vocal ability and dare to sing, and at the same time we are aware of our own shortcomings and constantly invest time and effort in improving oursleves. It's tricky.

Haiya. I quite pissed with myself I cannot articulate my thoughts properly in front of people. They're always clearer when I write them down, type them out. But end up doesn't get across, so don't achieve much.

Night was DramaFeste. Went to help out as usher again, and after intermission I koped Lewis' seat and watched the remaining plays. Must say BW's performance surprised me... I don't recall being so intrigued and captivated by their play during full dress rehearsal... Haha. And MR's didn't seem as good as their rehearsal, the cast sounded pretty nervous and unsettled when they first started doing their stuff. But I thought the chair thing was very clever.

Oh. And RP Exco spoof was just hilarious. Haha.

ehh. the past few days

2007-02-23T22:23:00.000+08:00

Ehh. Had Colours Ceremony on Wed, which is really some waste time thing... And the whole proceedings was so rushed, as if everybody was trying to get it over and done with - which kind of undermines the supposed belief that it does have some signifiance. And they started reciting the creed before all the CCALs were back in their seats... Haiya so weird. Maybe the video should have come after the presentation of school flags if they needed some time...

But oh wells. I guess nobody really cares too.

Ehh. We went to the area outside GO for prac on Wed as well... just to try out the acoustics. Set up the tiers as well. It does sound better than LT2 (maybe too much echo) and I think the whole concept will be interesting as well... Don't know if I'm the only one (or part of the few) who thinks this way lol.

Ehh. Thurs I went to listen to GP talk - but didn't really manage to pick up much - and after that I watched the full-dress rehearsal for DramaFeste (after the usher meeting). Quite peculiar how DramaFeste always seems to be a high-stress event for everyone involved (last year seemed this way also), maybe it's an inevitable component in striving for high standards. I thought last year's plays were generally better, but then I can't really compare since I didn't really watch last year's... but at the rehearsal yesterday I didn't really understand a lot of the plays so yeah. Could be just me as well haha, me being below their level.

Just came back from first night of usher duty. Its pretty sian, and the seats were all labelled and signs were good so getting to seats was really not that difficult a task, so all the aisle ushers felt very redundant. Block the aisle somemore... Something good may be the "intimidating effect" because there wasn't much problem - or maybe the audience was just super cooperative. Haha.

Past few nights I've been sleeping first and waking up later (fresh!) to do homework... Would sleep by about 2am or 3am. And in the morning I would be on high alert (maybe the adrenaline) all the way until afternoon... when I start to KO. Must start to shift back... Can feel like I'm falling sick already. Oh well. Though those mornings felt really productive.

on the third day of new year

2007-02-20T23:18:00.000+08:00

Morning was spent in school... Lol. Running first then FRINGE practice... Things are getting better I must say, but still a bit slow. Ah well. Have to give it a bit of time...

Umm. Other than that, didn't do much today... Spent the day doing homework and stuff... Pretty sian. But school's resuming tmr anyway so have to gear up for that... Was telling my mum this afternoon I think I'm the kind who would rather 一辈子吃喝玩乐 or 一辈子忙忙碌碌, really cannot stand having breaks when the momentum has just get going. Maybe I have high inertia. Hard to move from state of rest.

One of my uncles (one of my dad's brothers) suddenly popped by just now to visit us... Haha pretty cool. I wanted to sit in at their conversation after I was done with the homework I was doing... but they left before I managed to. Ah well.

And that marks the end of the CNY holiday... I wanted to think a little about stuff over CNY, but it turned out that I didn't really have the time to. Oh well, at least I've set up the chair already (much thanks to the Chorale J1s! it's really comfy, especially after my mum found some cushions for it... almost fell asleep on it just now :P) so I guess there'll be chances.

Sometime back I started thinking I could think less do more; but doing without thinking, and experiencing stuff without expectation/intention/purpose seems to be a pretty blind affair... Waste of time, and the good experiences end up being random chance occurences. But I suppose it's about balance again, and not choosing one over the other.

Balance... I don't think I've found the right one yet.

Haha what a reflective New Year.

on the second day of new year

2007-02-19T21:05:00.000+08:00

Ohh today was so much more exciting than expected... haha. This morning I woke up and continued reading newspaper articles and magazines, and Mum suddenly said she wanted to go Ikea. So we went lor, and left Bro at home alone since he didn't want to go.

Ikea was a really nice place. A different kind of shopping experience. They had this showroom on the second level so people would just walk around and see the furniture, and the actual buying is done on the first level, where all the stocks are. It's a lot of self-service, do-it-yourself, which is pretty cool because sometimes having that shop assistant following you around can be a bit unsettling. For me lah anyway. And you aren't left alone too, because there are some customer service counters around, and there's quite a bit of information on the price tag as well.

Did a bit of furniture shopping - ohh I saw the soft toys which Ms Lee bought for our class last year too! The turtle, the octopus, the shark, the fish... Lol. Had lunch at the cafe there - I think the whole concept is very smart: see see, eat food, then go down to buy... too bad the food wasn't that good - before heading to Courts next door to see see, and then heading home.

The coolest part of today must be this... After we hit home we began to assemble the 8 DIY chairs we had bought, and it was my first time assembling my own chair :) We even had some assembly line thing so we finished assembling all 8 chairs pretty quickly haha... Might have been a pretty simple thing, but then again, when you do something for the first time, there's a lot of satisfaction that goes into it.

Went running at the cemetery with Bro after we were done... Don't know why he suddenly so random haha. But it's a pretty nice place to run as well - somewhat park-like, but I think will get sian of it after a while.

Dinner (first dinner on those 8 chairs!) was spent trying to finish the leftover steamboat stuff... Has always been like this. Not that I mind actually... Haha.

So now... I think I shall go find something to do... Wonder how tomorrow will be. Hmmmm.

on the first day of new year

2007-02-18T23:26:00.000+08:00

Haha I must admit my New Year is very boring... Other than today, I don't think we're going on visitations or anything.

Like previous years, first thing we did this morning was to go for new year gathering (Mum's side). And like previous years, we ate a little something (used to be steamboat and vegetarain stuff, yesterday was dumplings, haha maybe it's the hassle). And like previous years, we took photos, family by family. It wasn't particularly exciting, but the cartoon they were watching was pretty interesting. I've never seen it before and it was actually quite nice. Lol.

Spent the afternoon at home, watching TV (there was this retarded Mandarin movie showing on TV, which was quite lame, quite kok, and sometimes quite funny... lol) and reading all the magazines which I didn't read because I had no time previously. Sounds a bit sad, but I think it was actually pretty well spent because we had no energy to go anywhere else after the morning thing. Haha.

I think night was the best... Went for steamboat dinner at Grandma's (Mum's mum) place, and I was listening in on the adults talking about stuff. Haha they are pretty random... Can jump from topic to topic, person to person. It's actually quite interesting listening to them talk, and there were some stuff to learn, some new perspectives to see things, so I actually didn't mind the 4 hour long gathering. And ocassionally they also asked me stuff, so I didn't feel as left out as I thought I would be. In fact... I think I'm beginning to like listening to them talk and being part of the conversation also, and my mum is pretty close to her sister and younger brother, so they get together pretty often... Haha. Don't know how Bro and Sis spent the night at home. Probably watching TV or something...

That's that then. Going to watch some Mandarin movie on TV now...

spring cleaning

2007-02-17T22:29:00.000+08:00

Haha today is CNY eve, so must do spring cleaning. But first! Went school this morning for FRINGE practice... A bit disappointed we didn't really get much done, but I guess we had people missing, and we need a bit of time to remember and recall (for J2s) / to get familiar with and used to (for J1s) what small group singing is like too. Definitely more demanding on the individual singer than normal Chorale prac...

And nobody likes to waste time: only way to avoid that is really to spend some time on your own to look through your scores before coming together, and also to be interested in developing your own voice and technique...

Haha I realise I sound very stern. I'm not! Just some thoughts only... :) All the way FRINGE! On a lighter note before FRINGE practice I went running, tried a 2.4km run and did 10min 10 sec :) Never detoriate, so quite cool... But what was cooler was I ran into Isaac and we went to run together, and at the track we ran into (as in we met her lah, not really run into...) Valerie who was starting on her 30min jogging routine. Like no longer a lonely morning run. Haha.

Spring cleaning was actually more like hiding things away rather than clearing things out... Lol. Every year it's pretty much the same thing: a few things would actually be spring-cleaned and thrown away, but most of the other stuff we hide somewhere where nobody can see. And ta da! House looks spick and span.

We had a steamboat dinner tonight! A lot of food... like everytime eat steamboat there will surely be leftovers... But maybe it's intended, because having leftovers signifies something to the extent of we will have things in excess for the year (年年有余). Ohh and tonight's steamboat quite different also, a lot of new food items which I never tried before... Haha. Bloated.

Wahh I'm dozing off.... Cannot leh. Must press on until 12am. Haha

longevity: the nobel exception

2007-02-17T22:03:00.000+08:00

by Mary Carmichael
(an article from Newsweek)

The Nobel Prize is a lot more than a medal. Winners get $1.4 million and the world's best resume line. Here's another thing to file under "life's not fair": Nobel winners also live longer. New research from the University of Warwick says that academics who get that fateful phone call from Sweden stick around about two years longer than colleagues who don't make the final list. The effect mirrors what's been seen before in Oscar winners, whose life spans grow with very statue they take home. (Tom Hanks will be with us forever). Since only four peeople have ever won multiple Nobels, though - and one, Marie Curie, had a shorter life because of her prize-winning work on dangerous radiation - the researchers couldn't document a truly identical trend. Still, they were able to figure out that, as with Oscars, it wasn't the cash that did the trick. Apparently, the key to long life among Nobel laureates was simply having the bragging rights.

The research has some lessons for mere mortals, too: it throws new light on an ongoing argument about why people of high social status tend to live longer, regardless of how much health care they get. One theory holds that winners - of prizes, but also in the game of life - are so buoyed by their achievements that their brains are "buffeted against any subsequent adversities," says the University of Toronto's Donald Redelmeier, who studies the Oscar phenomenon. In other words, stress doesn't bother these folks as much. Redelmeier's own explanation? After you've reached the pinnacle, you behave more carefully. "You'd be quite disciplined to be seen drunk in public if you've got a Nobel Prize, " he says. Unless, of course, you're tipsy from a little celebratory champaghne - or, for that matter, a toast to your longevity.

neutrality

2007-02-13T19:52:00.000+08:00

Somehow this term keeps hitting back at me... haha.

During GP whenever the teacher asks, "Do you all even have an opinion?", I'm like, thinking to myself, "Ehh. No leh. Not really."

And the other day at reunion dinner, my sister suddenly commented that I'm a pretty neutral person. Ask me anything I also say "Don't know lah". Which is quite true... whenever she asks for my opinion or thoughts or something I usually don't know what to say and just say something to entertain her.

One of my uncles picked up on that and we talked a bit about that... like how I don't have strong preference for things and stuff... Perhaps I don't feel enough for things. Or perhaps, like what what one of my aunts said, I'm not really affected by a lot of things other people would be affected by, and which other people would expect me to be affected by. A lot of things which other people think should matter don't really matter to me, or matter in a different way.

I'm pretty easy-going I guess... always see the other side of things. Haha. Like. Can always see silver lining behind the cloud, and good things among bad. Like. Almost all the time. Don't know if I'm faking myself or whether that is the real me...

I don't think I don't feel for things... Maybe I just don't feel for things which most other people feel for. And I don't feel for a lot of things too.

Haha. Neutrality. I don't know what to do about it, or whether I should do something about it.

me is 18

2007-02-11T11:37:00.000+08:00

Haha I don't really feel older or anything... In fact I've never really felt older or anything with each birthday and it just dawned on me last night that: Wow. I'm actually 18. Hmm. But what does being 18 mean anyway... Haha.

I was really surprised and touched by the birthday celebration the Chorale people had for me... I had gussed something would happen but I didn't expect it to be such a big thing! And I didn't expect them to wait an hour as well... didn't expect Debbie and Gengrui to come back from NUS H3 too... Thanks a lot guys :) It was really special because I never really celebrated my birthday before all these years... Most of the time it was a quiet little thing, just having dinner with my family (which is not bad as well haha but just different).

In particular, thanks J1s for the lovely chair and the dog! Haha although I was pretty stunned yesterday and didn't really know what to do with them. But don't worry they're at home now! I will sit on the chair often, but as for the dog... haha see how lah.

Thanks to Ruth, Avonne, Hui Lin, Wei Song, Jing Zhong, Zhao Feng, Yi Kai, Sandra, Matthias and Nikki for the nice long sleeve shirt. Fits really well! Oh and I kept the wrapping paper too... never throw away :)

Thanks Adrian for the book. Haha I don't know if I'll ever get down to reading it... like got so many other books to read and I take so long for each. But I think I'll let it cut queue and I'll get started on it after I'm done with the one I'm reading now haha.

Thanks to Jina, Chin Ee, Gerard and Tricia for the shirt (another shirt haha) and the card. It's a really nice card! The nicest I've had in don't know how many years... haha much thanks to Trish Pte Ltd for concept and production.

Oh and thanks to my Angel (don't know whether #1 or #2...) also for the chopsticks. Haha.

Also, thanks to Tim Chow and Xavier for the ice-cream treat at HH house party :)

Last thing... Thanks to all those who SMSed me as well :) Really made my day because they came in one by one from morning to night and each time one came in it made me happy. And to those who wished me a belated birthday, thanks for extending the birthday joy too :)

hmmm.

2007-02-06T19:51:00.000+08:00

Past two days have been... Haha I don't know how to put it.

I realised I talked to a number of people these two days and haven't been doing much work. On one hand it was really nice to have talked to them but on the other the slacking is worrying... And today when we were doing the time management thing I realise that I'm very prone to procrastinating. And putting things off. Lol.

Seems to me that the things which I value have changed, or it may be that I'm finding a new balance. Good or bad I don't know... but sometimes I really envy people who aren't tied down to things, who can do the things they like, who really enjoy what they're doing.

But we can never really know what we like to do, can we? Except perhaps after stepping into things we don't really like and learning that we didn't like that. Again, it's experience. And it's by elimination. Which is why sometimes I also think back and find myself really silly for not trying new things and getting that exposure.

I really wonder what is it I really want - for myself, for my life. What is it that gives me satisfaction, and how real can I be? After all we all seek to find acceptance from others - it's only natural to do that I guess, however self-sufficient and independent one may be. Or appear to be. But it's hard to find acceptance if we don't conform in some way - be it big or small.

And sometimes it is only after a period of time when we realise that we made the wrong choice, or what we chose isn't really what we want... I know this very well, so while there's the regret, I see it as necessary for me to live with the consequences. Because whatever choice you made, others will surely be implicated in some way and I don't want to let others down.

So I will slog it out, however hard it may be.

And then I'm also grateful for having made so many friends in JC - people whom I find it comfortable to just talk to them about stuff and pour things out, even though they may know this and may not even realise it and just take it as idle chatter. Haha.

And I'm also happy that I've got closer to my family - dad, mum, brother (this one... somewhat lah haha) sister, grandma... Or at least I feel closer lah. Find it more comfortable to talk to them now than before. I find that I talk more to them as well. Haha.

Hmm. I must sound pretty incongruent and weird now. It's just that I haven't had the time or energy to think about this kind of thing lately so now suddenly got outburst. Haha but I'm alright lah.

haha.

2007-02-05T02:10:00.000+08:00

Spent today doing pretty much nothing! A nice change from the whole week leading up to the camp :)

Woke up at 10am this morning, and went for a nap again at 1pm. And in those hours where I was awake, I couldn't help but think about the camp, which is pretty much what I spent today doing (in addition to watching Superstar on Channel U, some drama serial on Channel 8, and Singapore vs Thailand on Channel 5 which all happened to be around the same time)

Had a lot of thoughts floating up in my mind so I ended up being pretty incongruent when I tried blogging about it. Haha. Gave up in the end.

But I don't mind reflecting on stuff this way... Some like to blog about it immediately after it's over (I used to do this) some like to talk about it with others, for me I like to just think back on it myself and indulge in a little personal space. And things just pop up one by one - things which I suppose matter to me.

So it was a day spent doing pretty much nothing, and yet not a day spent in vain.

roly poly celebrates veggie day

2007-01-23T20:29:00.000+08:00

Haha I dunno why but I suddenly proclaimed today Veggie Day.

During lunch I went to the yong tau foo stall and had the lady's finger, the bittergourd, the cabbage, the xiao bai cai, and the huang bai cai. Oh and I had one egg tofu also because I like it. Haha.

I realised that it wasn't very tasty and the lady's finger and bittergourd tasted weird but not bad lah. Although not very full. Should have more cabbage though. And maybe try kang kong next time...

Went to the gym after I reached home this evening. Haha yesterday evening I went to swim also. I find that exercise is a pretty good way to de-stress, relax, and recharge. As long as I don't over-exert and end up feeling tired lah lol.

Today Shujing said I looked like a roly poly. I was like wth... haha but then again wouldn't it be nice if I could really be like a roly poly (not look like one ah btw). Bounce back from the downs and face them all with a smile.

i am a blue flower

2007-01-19T20:56:00.000+08:00

Saw this off Hui Lin's blog and randomly decided to try... haha.

You Are a Blue Flower

A blue flower tends to represent peace, openness, and balance.
At times, you are very delicate like a cornflower.
And at other times, you are wise like an iris.
And more than you wish, you're a little cold, like a blue hydrangea.

What Color Flower Are You?

菊花台

2007-01-19T20:32:00.000+08:00

周杰伦

This is the newest song that I like!

Especially this line: 徒留我孤单在湖面成双... May sound weird, but there's some tragic beauty in this act of finding company in oneself...

你的泪光柔弱中带伤
惨白的月弯弯勾住过往
夜太漫长凝结成了霜
是谁在阁楼上冰冷地绝望

雨轻轻弹朱红色的窗
我一生在纸上被风吹乱
梦在远方化成一缕香
随风飘散你的模样

菊花残满地伤
你的笑容已泛黄
花落人断肠我心事静静躺
北风乱夜未央
你的影子剪不断
徒留我孤单在湖面成双

花已向晚飘落了灿烂
凋谢的世道上命运不堪
愁莫渡江秋心拆两半
怕你上不了岸一辈子摇晃

谁的江山马蹄声狂乱
我一身的戎装呼啸沧桑
天微微亮你轻声的叹
一夜惆怅如此委婉

菊花残满地伤
你的笑容已泛黄
花落人断肠我心事静静躺
北风乱夜未央
你的影子剪不断
徒留我孤单在湖面成双

菊花残满地伤
你的笑容已泛黄
花落人断肠我心事静静躺
北风乱夜未央
你的影子剪不断
徒留我孤单在湖面成双

men who love handbags

2007-01-18T21:08:00.000+08:00

Haha this pretty much got me stunned but anyway:

http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/01/17/news/rbag.php

much.

2007-01-14T23:26:00.000+08:00

Quite a lot have happened these few days. And I don't really know what to make of them. Disillusioned, is that the word?

I think I've asked someone before: is it just me? And you know what, I really don't know.

So I'll take things slowly I guess.

language

2007-01-12T20:56:00.000+08:00

Bleah. I think me speaking English is really formal. And at times fierce. And sometimes quite fake also...

Sometimes the Singlish helps to de-formalise and de-fiercify it. But then hor, sometimes also trivialises it...

Aiyah I prefer speaking in Chinese. Somehow it's more natural :)

Oh, and today was a really cold day... Rained all day and now the floor is freezing :S

i just got conned into drinking coke

2007-01-12T00:42:00.000+08:00

Aiyoh. Whoever poured the Coke into the Peach Tea bottle is damn 厉害.

These few days have been pretty hectic... Had lots to do. It's been this way since school re-opened, and I think it might get worse soon... I didn't believe it when the seniors said how crazy J2 life is and how we should really enjoy ourselves in J1, but now I can. Haha.

Busy-ness can be stressful at times (I think stress comes mainly from the perception that you've got too many things to do and too little time) and it takes a toll on other aspects of life (eg. health, friends), but it's not too bad a thing too I guess. Keeps me occupied, and teaches me to appreciate the little short breaks I get. Also stretches me and challenges my limits :)

Oh. I need to get started on my SATs. I told myself last Sunday that I'll do at least one hour everyday. And I haven't even started. Yikes.

Meanwhile. Back to what I was doing.

an outline of psychoanalysis

2007-01-07T12:27:00.000+08:00

I remember seeing Zhao Feng reading this book and word "psychoanalysis" itself got me pretty curious so I decided to look for the book.

And now I'm done with it. Haha.

This one was really interesting. Was especially interested in the Es, Ich and Uber-Ich (the human psyche) and dreams. And did you know that all our drives (impulses) can be classfied as Eros or destruction-drives? First seeks to create and maintain unities; second seeks to destroy.

So like. Eating can be thought of as destroying food, but with the aim of incorporating it into the body. Cool.

Might have to cut down on my personal reading (not to say I was reading a lot before that... but as you might be able to tell it's just that I got into a book frenzy during the holidays, haha) now that school has started. The first week of school felt like a period of extreme time dilation - I feel like I've done a lot of things and the week just seems to be stretched out.

Ironically, while it's tiring, it feels like I've accomplished much. Haha. Keyword is "feel" - don't know if I've really done so lah. But anyhow there's a sense of achievement. And now it feels good to be able to take a rest, even if for only one day.

It's a different kind of happiness I guess. You set out to do something, the process might make you feel terrible, but if you press on and survive those, and finally hit the end point, then you feel really good about yourself.

伤城

2007-01-05T00:10:00.000+08:00

你知不知道酒为什么那么好喝?

就是因为它很难喝.

I liked that line in the movie... I'm not sure if the director/scriptwriter meant to talk some nonsense or if he really meant something but I think he did mean for it to mean something.

It's not phrased particularly nicely or anything... but pretty thought-provoking. I think.

happy new year!

2007-01-01T11:11:00.000+08:00

Haha its quite amusing that I was listening to fireworks at 12 last night while others were actually looking at it.

But anyway, its 2007 already. A new year. A new start. I have a few resolutions in mind, but I shan't write them down. Haha. Scared they'll lose that binding power.

Happy new year everyone!

why i pangseh

2006-12-30T23:49:00.000+08:00

Chian Yeh accuses me of pangseh so I shall explain myself now!

Err. Basically I was at the Chamber group gathering lah lol. Think we're quite a close bunch of people now, especially the group of J1s in Chamber. We spent the afternoon mainly playing Homojaleh (must thank 大姐 Nikki for teaching us this game...) and other card games. Eh. I also spent the afternoon playing with two small boys (one 5 yrs one 7 yrs). Haha. Didn't know I could do that kind of thing wan... Now got the confidence to read to the children for CIP next year.

So that was why I missed the class outing! Board games cafe and Deathnote 2... Heard from Chun Fung it was quite fun. Ah well... Oh and I must catch Deathnote 2 another day.

After the Chamber group gathering ended some of us went for dinner at Pizza Hut (in Thomson Plaza). And we spent a pretty long time there as well, mostly kokking around. Think we made a lot of noise. Oops.

Oh. This morning I went for the RV celebrate-trip cum Sec4-farewell thing too. With Chin Ee, Gengrui, Zhao Feng and Jing Zhong. Lol. It was really nice of the new Comm to invite the alumni and for a moment it felt a bit like I was in RV again. Caught up a bit with some of the Sec4s and also kokked around a bit with some of the other juniors. Haha. Didn't turn out to be as waste-time as I thought (for alumni lah, since we just go there and see see only).

blink

2006-12-30T08:23:00.000+08:00

by Malcolm Gladwell

I finished this book yesterday. Haha yeah it's another book by Malcolm Gladwell, who wrote The Tipping Point. This one talks about snap judgements and how we can develop and hone this seemingly inaccessible ability.

Whether it really works or not, I don't know lah. I still prefer to take some time to think things through, although sometimes thinking too much really isn't very good for decision-making, because when you suddenly have so many considerations to consider, it's like an information overload in your head. Turns out to be confusing, especially when these considerations may not be very significant or important.

uh oh.

2006-12-29T22:07:00.000+08:00

Oh my I don't know what happened to me...

I just tested my vocal range. And now I can hit low E flat. Like audible low E flat. :S

So scary.

resolutions

2006-12-26T16:33:00.000+08:00

Ahh it's that time of the year to think about next year.

I need to find some way to "bind" myself to my resolutions. Like. Writing them down doesn't work anymore... Must be because I didn't do all the things which I wrote down and said I would do. So the "binding" power diminished bit by bit, so much so that now, it's lost :S

Err. But must think of resolution first lah. Haha.

merry christmas!

2006-12-25T22:43:00.000+08:00

Ahh. Christmas. Don't have the habit of celebrating Christmas, buying presents, making cards etc... So Christmas for me is really just "another public holiday". Maybe next year I'll celebrate Christmas. Haha.

So... Spent Christmas morning in school with Yong Chun, Chianyeh and Ramona. 4 people with not-so-much-life but who insist they're merely living a different kind of life... Haha. Fitness today was pretty normal lah, just a little running and basketball.

Christmas lunch was spent with the same 3 at Pastamania, after which we went for bubble tea. And we wanted to squeeze in that small area in the playground. But it was raining, so we didn't. Ah well...

Christmas afternoon was spent doing some item trading on Diablo II (:P), and online where I did Round 1 of my Merry Christmas-ing. In the evening I went for dinner with some relatives (mother's side), just a simple gathering of sorts, and just now I was doing Round 2 of Merry Christmas-ing.

Ahh I can see I'm going to be busy this week... But it's going to be busy eating, playing and just having fun. Lol. Sure fall sick at the end of the week or something like that wan.

think it through.

2006-12-22T23:49:00.000+08:00

Hmm. How do I say this... I feel more at ease now :) Sorted out some things today at fitness. Lol.

Thanks to Chian Yeh, Chun Fung, Shaun and Yong Chun who very kindly sponsored half my Curse of the Golden Flower movie ticket! I watched it on Wed with some Chorale ppl and then today they wanted to watch it too. And I was a bit :S becos its $8 for one ticket. So... thanks!

Curse of the Golden Flower is quite cool. I pretty much liked the fight scenes, espcially those with Chow Yun Fatt's ruthlessly cool black-clothed assasins who wield crescent swords and do ODAC stuff like abseil and flying fox. Gong Li's red-clad archers and infantry were quite cool too. And Jay Chou's golden army vs Chow Yun Fatt's silver army was pretty stunning as well. Think it was because of the richness in colour.

As for the meaning, I didn't really get it until I read the review in Life! and then I was like "Ohh. Yah. Makes sense." So yah.

at the end of each day

2006-12-22T00:10:00.000+08:00

At the end of each day, somehow, I'll always ask myself: Have I been productive today?

And most of the time it's a: No.

But I don't really know why I'm stuck in this. And I don't really know whether I really don't know. Or whether I know, but don't really know what to do about it.

Aiyah. Sian. How do I up the feeling of productivity.

Maybe. I need some mean person to look at my life and tell me to wake up my idea.

smallness

2006-12-21T21:54:00.000+08:00

I kind of like small groups of people. Like max. about 5 or 6 like that. For work. For play. For talk kok. For almost anything lah...

Tend to feel more comfortable in small groups. If you're talking about work, I find it easier to manage and communicate. And most of the time, I don't think you really need such a large group also... since most of the work is probably done by a few people. Haha. Like what Gladwell said in The Tippping Point.

If you're talking about talk kok, small groups are cool too. Small group setting is more relaxed and more cosy. Easier to talk kok. Feel more comfortable also. Easier to open up.

But that's me lah. Think it's different for different people.

messager

2006-12-20T00:38:00.000+08:00

I think ah. Handphones are becoming more and more like messaging devices than phones. Like I know people who don't pick up calls and just send SMS (haha) and I also know people whose phone spoil already cannot pick up calls or make calls but don't really care and just send SMS (lol).

But seriously, seems like people preferr sending messages than making calls. Is it really an issue with cost? With so many messages sent here and there, and 5cents for each message exceeding the number provided free, it doesn't seem so... For me, at least, I think I should make more calls to exploit my 100min free outgoing.

May be because of the visual element of messages. Helps people remember information better. Or it may be because SMS is an "escapist" way of communication. It is understood that there is a lag time involved between sending a message and getting a reply back. Like. The phone may not be with the person, person may be busy with other things, takes time for the operator to process etc. And this lag time allows people to choose not to reply: without any consequence - because it's understood that there is a lag time involved. So people accomodate that.

Haha I know it. Because I've done it before... Oops.

It all boils down to personal responsibility I guess. The medium makes it easier to "cheat", but if it's not in you, then it's just not in you. In the case of SMS, one who does not "cheat" would probably reply as quickly as he can, maybe not to all messages, but at least to those he deems urgent and in need of reply.

some rain.

2006-12-20T00:20:00.000+08:00

These days are getting busy. And somehow I'm so tired (or sian) that I don't feel like blogging. Ah well.

Went to the dentist before heading to school for Caroling prac. I was kind of soaked on my way there due to the rain (which is really some rain) so I was freezing inside the room. Super cold. Plus I spent a long time there today because I changed some of my brackets (don't know why also).

Going to school wasn't that bad. It wasn't raining in Bishan when I was walking from the MRT station but after that it started to pour. So we ended up playing soccer in the Amphi. Lol. Supposed to be OK if you're wearing PE attire. Which doesn't really make sense because of all the possible damages to the sounds-like-hollow ceiling (which is the floor of LT1) and to the ~~amplifiers~~ speakers. But never mind. We played a lot of on-the-ground.

I think playing barefoot gives you more control, but destroys your sole. Like got bits and pieces of skin tearing here and there :S

Caroling prac was OK. But it was very tiring. I think it's because of the night. Night practices are really very draining. Somehow. And at the end of prac, you really feel like you had a physical and mental workout. Eh, I'm still stuck with my jingle bells, and now Adrian is stuck with the triangle, and Nikki and Gengrui each have a chime too. Haha. Hope Saturday goes well.

Tomorrow (actually, later this morning) is yet another busy day. Sometimes being busy isn't that bad after all... Makes you feel productive. And useful. Like. You aren't really wasting your time.

Hope later-this-morning goes well.

Strange. I know I'm tired and I can feel it, but somehow I'm not sleepy. Weird.

why start early

2006-12-17T23:58:00.000+08:00

It's kinda common to hear people say that if you can do things early, then do it early. Plan early. Less stressful. More buffer time in case anything unexpected crops up. Etc.

So, I was just wondering... what does starting early accomplish? What does it really do? And ultimately, why start early? I think there are two possible outcomes.

1) You start something early, and finish it early. I think this is what most people have in mind when they preach starting early. It's a good strategy, because you get it over and done with and you get to move on. But sometimes (ironically)I find it quite stressful to finish things early. Seems like if you finish things too early, there's this long waiting period between completion and the actual deadline. And anything can happen in this period of time. What's worse for me is that I am one who would keep thinking about it (eg. can any improvements can be made?) until I actually submit it.

2) You start something early, you take your time with it, and finish it on time. In this case, the process is longer, but you do a little at each time. It's kind of like breaking a cookie into a lot of pieces and eating it slowly, rather than waking up earlier to eat the cookie at the same pace someone who wakes up later would, and finish it earlier than the person who wakes up later. I think prefer this outcome. Doing a little each time makes the task more palatable, and it's easier on you because you have time. But the process does get drawn out and this may get you frustrated - you keep thinking: how come I do this thing for so long and it's still not done?

So... is it really that good to start early? After all, when things change so rapidly and things crop up every now and then, does it really make sense to, for instance, plan something long before it is supposed to happen?

I don't know... I believe in a comfortable pace for yourself (if it's individual work) or for the team (if it's a team effort). Of course things get a bit more complicated if it's a team effort because it's difficult to agree on a comfortable pace and more often that not, a pace has got to be set. By someone.

And in this respect, I don't think I've done very well :S

But ultimately, what is most devastating is if your work involves external parties whom you have no influence over, and if they see no value in earliness. Then you're caught in a pretty troublesome and frustrating situation. Where you might spend your time chasing. And chasing. And chasing.

the human bluetooth

2006-12-14T10:30:00.000+08:00

Haha. The human bluetooth. Was talking about it with Chin Ee, Adrian and Gengrui last night at dinner after our prac for the 16th after someone mentioned that he wanted to gain some weight (can't remember who... lol).

So. The idea was that if we could equip ourselves with a bluetooth or infrared port then we can turn it on and send things to or receive things from another person! And then those who want to gain weight can just ask for some from those who want to lose.

And the world will be a happier place :P

Yesterday we resumed Chorale prac and started learning the SYF set piece. It's really sick :S All sorts of weird rhythms and notes and words... But ah well.

There were a lot of things I wanted to think further about... but after last night's sleep I can't seem to remember them. Maybe such is the power of time. It kind of erodes things. But at least I thought a little about them yesterday.

flu

2006-12-09T23:24:00.000+08:00

Shucks I think I'm falling sick. Feel a bit flu-ish now.

Anyway... went to school today in the morning for our 6+1 performance on 16 Dec. Wasn't too bad I think, experimented with some new songs and sort of firmed up what we're going to sing on 16th, but still subject to "approval" from Mr Toh. Lol.

I like singing in that small group... Standard wise we're not say very good, but it's nice to sing with people whom you know share a similarly strong (or even stronger) interest in singing, and people whom you can actually make chords with. Haha. Five years of singing together must be the reason why :) Maybe that's why sometimes less is more.

But then again, it can get pretty tiring also. And mentally demanding. Less is more also lor.

On the whole, I think singing in small groups is pretty cool. Maybe it's because you feel more important (since there are less people) and when you pull something off nicely, you know you definitely had a part to play. So the sense of satisfaction and achievement is greater. And I guess there's more freedom with regard to the kind of repertoire you're doing also.

So in the afternoon we went to Emily's house for caroling prac. Less people today as well... Lol so many busy people. But it turned out to be a rather intensive session. And fulfilling too. But quite tired now :S

Next week we're resuming Chorale prac! Yeah man. Going to learn the SYF set piece, which has finally come in. Think many people won't be able to make it... But doesn't matter. Haha. It's been such a long time since we had Chorale prac... Will be nice to see the Chorale people and sing together again.

Eh actually I realise I see quite a lot of them every week with soccer and caroling... but never mind. Still got other people :P

http://www.weffriddles.com

2006-12-07T08:04:00.000+08:00

Jing Xuan introduced the above to me yesterday night... It's like a trail of riddles, which is quite difficult. Currently I'm stuck at Level 14 with some cryptic message and a weird photo of I-don't-know-what.

If you boliao and got nothing else better to do, can go try! Haha.

commitment

2006-12-06T21:34:00.000+08:00

Today I made a comment about commitment which (as an afterthought) I thought wasn't very fair.

All along I've believed that one cannot have too many commitments, otherwise you would not be doing justice to yourself and to whoever/whatever you're committing yourself to. So that is why sometimes I refrain from taking on too many things, even though I feel like I may really enjoy taking on more and doing more.

I guess that's why I made that comment. Must admit it was a sloppy, hasty judgement. Commitment to me entails reserving time - perhaps even more time than what may actually be required. So I guess sometimes I tend to judge unfairly. Ultimately, what matters is whether you are able to commit in depth, and not in breadth. And if you're able to do both, that's really all the better.

I don't know if anybody picked it up and took it seriously, but I did... Lol. And I came to terms that it wasn't a very fair comment. Hence this.

Yep.

If there's anyone who can understand it in context, this goes out to you... It was my bad.

guilt

2006-12-05T15:51:00.000+08:00

You know, one month of the hols has passed. And I feel somewhat guilty that I didn't exactly make the best use of my time. Like I could have done more things within that one month. So far, it seems like Nov has been a month of play and fun, and pretty much nothing else.

Actually... why should I be feeling guilty when the hols are, well, I guess, meant to be a time to relax to play? I think it's because even in the hols, I still want to maintain a work-play balance. I still want to feel productive, like I'm doing something (might not be school work or work per se)and not wasting my time. Perhaps it's not the same kind of balance as that during the school term, but I think having a balance is still important.

So the funny thing is how at the end of a wasted day, I end up thinking that I wasted today and I should not waste tomorrow. And when tomorrow comes, I don't feel very strongly as I did the previous night.

Seems like after a night of sleep, the guilt fades. Over the course of a wasted day, it builds up, only to dissipate the next day. And so I end up wasting day after day.

I think that's why I feel the I way I feel now.

Hmmm.

10km in 1hr

2006-12-05T15:36:00.000+08:00

Wahh. Did a 10km run in 1 hour in the morning just now. Haha looks like I'm a bit late because I told myself I would do it by 3 Dec, and I did it in the gym, so maybe not very "correct"... but ah well.

Muahaha I actually did it!

It was pretty satisfying actually... never thought I could hold out for 1 hour running non-stop. And I didn't really train or anything for it also, which tells me that maybe the body can take more!

You know, most of the time when we see people do marathons or half-marathons we think the distance is crazy and they are damn man. But I realise today that that unwavering perception is there because we haven't attempted such distances before. Now I can appreciate what some people mean by saying that running 8km or 10km really isn't much. Once you try it, you realise that it isn't that difficult after all.

So I guess the reason why certain limits and barriers seem so impregnable is because we haven't tried, and we don't believe we can do it. In other words, we underestimate our ability.

Ahh but my legs are quite sore now. During the run you don't really feel it but after the run everything sets in :S. And tomorrow still got fitness session with the class (hope will have people come... lol). More running again. Haha.

nokia 6070

2006-12-04T23:54:00.000+08:00

Haha I've switched to a Nokia 6070. Got the phone for free after upgrading my phone plan last Friday. It's really quite different from a Motorola and I think it will take some time getting used to... Lol.

As a tribute to my old phone, which stood by me for about 2 and a half years, here is a photo of it.

The Motorola dont-know-what-model.

Erm.

Never again shall calls and SMSes bother you.

Yep.

the tipping point

2006-12-04T23:09:00.000+08:00

by Malcolm Gladwell

Hmm. Another insightful book which offers a new perspective. Haha. Talks about how tweaking little things can bring about big changes. And why some ideas or products spread while others don't. Pretty interesting, but I'm a little skeptical lah. Seems a bit radical.

Maybe should try to apply. And see. Heh.

And now that I'm done with this, its time to move on to another book! Haha.

only love

2006-12-01T00:51:00.000+08:00

by Trademark

Heard Bro playing this song a few days back. It's got a really nice tune, which actually sounds like the tune of a Chinese pop song. Haha.

2am and the rain is falling
Here we are at the crossroads once again
You're telling me you're so confused
You can't make up your mind
Is this meant to be
You're asking me

But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But I believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do

In your arms as the dawn is breaking
Face to face and a thousand miles apart
I've tried my best to make you see
There's hope beyond the pain
If we give enough
If we learn to trust

But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But I believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So I just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But I can make you see it through
That's something only love can do

I know if I could find the words
To touch you deep inside
You'll give my dreams just one more chance
To let this be our last goodbye

But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But I believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So I just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But I can make you see it through
That's something only love can do

That's something only love can do

cockroaches

2006-11-30T23:54:00.000+08:00

Umm. The past few days I've been going back to school to play with cockroaches. Haha. It's Chian Yeh's, Chun Fung's, Zhu Hui's and Yuxiu's chem project which involves some lemongrass, some pandan and a lot of cockroaches.

Actually I realise that the cockroaches are pretty interesting. Like they will grab their own feelers and run them through their two front legs (or maybe hands, I don't know) once in a while. Maybe to clean them or something. And I think they really love apples. All the apple pieces we dumped in the box/cage thing disappeared in one day's time. Haha.

Yesterday was caroling. Somehow, it was pretty exhausting, even though we didn't really sing much. Weird. But not bad lah. The sound was better in the beginning and in the end we all just died... But oh well. After caroling we went to Kenny Rogers for a long and kok-ful dinner. I felt the chicken was so-so only. But the side dishes were quite filling. Think it's because we ordered all the carbohydrates, like got potatos and macaroni and cheese, and because it was a large serving.

And then, after that, Chin Ee, Adrian, Jing Zhong and I went to Changi Airport to see the RV ppl off. Really hope they do well :) And luckily Yi Kai gave Jing Zhong and me a lift home, otherwise we would either be 1) taking taxi home and crying over the expensive cab fare, or 2) taking 53 until Bishan and walking home. Thanks man!

Today... As I was on the bus, returning home from school, I decided to go for a haircut. Lol. Ended up falling asleep while the barber was cutting my hair. Umm. How it looks now is umm... Well. Haha.

But the funny thing was as soon as the barber finished cutting my hair it started pouring. Like seriously pouring. So I braved the rain (and got drenched while doing so) to the bus stop and decided to take a bus home instead of my usual 10min walk. And then! As soon as I reached home. The rain stopped. Like seriously it just stopped. No more water -.-

Feel so jacked. But the heaviness of the rain reminded me of that time when we were going to Emily's house, and the chill of the wind reminded me of that time when we were in Vienna shivering under umbrellas. Lol.